I have once peed my pants as a kid and cried over it. I'm not half as artsy, nerdy, attractive, smart, funny or average as I think I am. I hate happy children, grumpy people, racists and black people. I think cigarettes are a hoax by the chewing gum industry. I don't think Godzilla is a metaphor for the fear of nuclear testing. I think it's a metaphor for the fear of giant amphibious monsters. I think the most painful experience to a man is not getting his penis caught in a fly. It's getting a fly caught in his penis.
